Today is Tue April 25, 2017
01 Mar. 2014

Love’s Language

womens-history-monthLOVE flowersValentine’s Day hovers past February 14th.

As we turn our attention to March—Women’s History Month—we want to bring awareness to how women feel in many areas.  First, we’ll talk about love’s language beyond the bedroom.

Far too often when we hear the words–desire and passion–our minds swiftly go to low hanging fruit: sex and romance.  Not that we’re saying anything’s wrong with those thoughts but we wanted to start a series that asks, “What is your love language?” The goal is to move this conversation in the direction of non-sexual intelligence: actions and activities that speak louder than words.

You get to participate! We are asking your feedback.

As an example of what we’re looking for, we’ve developed a couple of examples that indicate non-sexual intelligence. We invite your comments and contributions.

If reading a book together seems boring, we suggest that you each get a copy of the same book, read it in tandem in different locations: one on the plane, the other on the train, both headed to an agreed upon location to discuss it.  The getaway will get a lot of play, be assured.

We all have to eat, right?

Making a favorite recipe or yearning your mom’s meatloaf and mac ‘n cheese may or may not get a rise. However, going out of your way to buy the secret spice used in these favorite recipes adds a new dimension to an age-old comfort.  This outing doesn’t have to be extravagant particularly if the secret ingredient is sold at a domestic outlet nearby, a short drive away, an online purchase perhaps.  It’s the effort that counts.  Making the effort to go to an imported cheese store or an exotic spice vendor enhances the experience and that’s what you’re seeking–an enhanced experience.

Love’s language is as creative as you make it.  Now, we want to hear back from you; if you’re stuck or are seeking the familiar to get you started, we asked relationship and romance expert, Dr. Yvonne Fulbright, to share three things to spark love’s language. 

Here’s what Dr. Yvonne suggests—

1. Treat every day like it’s Valentine’s Day. Couples shouldn’t wait ’til that one day per year that they’re expected to woo and romanticize each other. Doing or saying something nice should be a part of the way you engage each other on a daily basis. This might be holding hands, giving a neck massage, buying a single flower, giving a compliment, sharing an erotic thought…

 2. Approaching meals as a care taking experience can make cooking much more enjoyable. If you see the activity as a way that you’re meeting each other’s needs, then it takes on a sensual component. This can be made even more so by incorporating healthy aphrodisiacs into a meal, e.g., garlic or mango. Remember, too, presentation can enhance the pleasure.

 3. Practice relationship generosity. Research regularly finds that doing little things for your lover, like taking care of the housework or making the other coffee ultimately enhances one’s sex life. These gestures have a partner feeling better about you, plus alleviate worries and responsibilities that can prevent one from relaxing and enjoying time with you!

 Send your suggestions for Love’s Language to:

NOTE – In subsequent features, we will bring awareness to women and their pursuits in: commerce, education, science, government and more.

About the author

Sandra Varner has had her hands on the pulse of the entertainment industry and lifestyles coverage for decades, staying current, always.


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